prison

I stare out the windows of my prison watching everyone else and I ask myself why am I in here only allowed to watch never to live. I want to do things with my life. Run, ride a bike, I want to dance with someone who truly loves me. I want to enjoy the day instead of dreading it. Mostly I want to be able to breath the fresh air. I can imagine the smell when i close my eyes, I can feel the sun on my skin the slight wind blowing my hair I just stand there and for a moment i forget I'm in prison. I want to be able to take my kids to a park and play. I want to take them on a well deserved vacation. I want to play a game of basketball with my son and watch him grow into a man. I want to take my daughter to the mall and watch her grow into a woman. I always wanted to live and work on a farm or a ranch somewhere. I want to go camping, take my kids fishing, I would love to take a hiking trip. I have all this energy and no where to go. I am locked behind these walls with only my thoughts to keep me company. My prison is not like other prisons you might know of, my cell is a 400lb cell i carry around with me every day. I cant look in the mirror because when I do I see myself trapped inside this cell only looking outward longing to be free. What I see is not the real me, I am trapped in here and I feel my self dieing a little bit more every day. I want to be set free